I can't believe this happened to me...again! I have really never been in situations where I have felt threatened or violated until recently.
So hear is what happened. My husband came home from work last Friday and just wanted to do something fun with his family. He didn't want to stay in, he wanted to go out. So we decided we could afford to take our kids out to dinner and a movie, if the movie was at the "Dollar" theatre.
That sounded great to the kids, as they jumped up and down in total disbelief at the wild and "generous" nature of their usually cheep parents. An outing was just what this family needed. So we checked for a fun family movie, packed the diaper bag and headed for Subway.
Dinner went off without a hitch, unless you count the baby throwing practically everyone's food off the table, but pretty normal for a family of 6. We were laughing as we hopped back in the car and headed to the theatre.
The first 30-40 minutes were great. I sat next to my husband holding his hand, enjoying the disney flick and pretty much thinking of how blessed I was.
Then of course the baby started to fuss. Lets face it, we knew this was going to happen. I stood up with her at the back. Some other parents were letting their kids run along the outside isle and my 16-month-old was raising objections that she was not allowed to join in. Since no one seemed to be complaining or giving the other children dirty looks, I let her down. (mistake #1)
I tried to follow closely enough that I could grab her if she became a problem. Most of the outside seats were not taken so she would bob in and out of an isle. On one of these occasions I grabbed her and sat her on my lap to see if she would stop and watch. (mistake #2)
I pointed to the movie and tried to whisper in her ear to help her understand what was happening, but a movement out of the corner of my eye caught my attention. While the baby was finally engaged in what was happening on screen, I looked over to see the curious movement that had caught my attention (mistake #3).
It was not a pleasant sight. Lets just say I saw a little too much of somebody. I was completely disgusted and immediately left the isle. As I thought more about it I grew more disgusted. How could this happen? Why was that guys girlfriend holding his hand and smiling about what was happening? Why was he at a kids flick? Did his girlfriend not understand how sick that really is?
My mind was reeling with disgust and rage that I completely forgot to report it. I waited until the movie was over and got my family out of there! They were a little confused why I was so angry, but they understood as I vented in the car on the way home (I believe in being totally honest with your children about such things, not hiding it from them so they will never know what to do if it happens to them). We all agreed I should have reported it and gotten him kicked out! Huge oversight! I was just so disgusted and enraged at the time to think clearly.
So here is what I've learned:
1.There is no place that is safe anymore outside the walls of your own home. Sad, but true. How can I as a good parent let my children experience the world while still protecting them from the most evil parts of it? Especially if evil is going to be in such vulnerable places?
2. The "dollar" movie is not the most reputable place. We are a family of 6 on a school teacher's salary and can't afford to take our kids to the "Big" movie theatre - even without dinner, it's $60. I guess in the future we will just wait for the Red Box and save even more.
3. I need to look past my disgust and rage and think of others. As I thought of that night, I have realized that that man could have been charged as a sexual predator. What other kind of person goes to a kids movie to please himself? A sick person who needs help. I usually have to take my husband kicking and screaming to those kinds of movies, most guys you probably would. The system is there to protect us and I should have used it.
It has been a funny few months where I have been "exposed" twice to these indecent episodes, and both times with my children. My heart is sad. This world is growing sicker and sicker and we are told by countless media people that we have every right to please ourselves. NO YOU DON'T! Not in front of my kids you don't! And if I ever see you again...you'd better watch out. Mama Bear is gonna go all crazy on you! (can you see my crazy eyes?)